Don’t Cry Over a $15 Haircut, Especially If Your Lips are Bleeding.

Its just past two in the morning. I’ve just finished vacuuming our room. Why am I doing this at two in the morning? Great question. Especially since one of Dr. K’s suggestions was to get to sleep before 11. Which is a little unrealistic for a 23-year-old if you ask me.

I probably should already be asleep. But I slept on and off all day today since R.J uncharacteristically jumped out of bed at 8:30 in the morning (to play the new Bioshock game, which he already finished,) and I didn’t have my usually Saturday morning ritual of waking up, walking Happy, and taking another 2 hour nap before he even gets out of bed.

I went with my mom to Delray so we could walk around the farmers market–and so that I could go with her to get an adjustment. She sometime sees a cousin of Alan’s who has a really gorgeous office in what used to be a Balanesian Spa. It’s got a lot of foliage.

My chiropractor was on a ski trip this week and I can’t wait till he’s back in the office on Monday so I can get re-adjusted.

This chiropractor’s office was so zen, I almost napped in the waiting room.

I was not feeling the zen buddha vibe this week though. My symptoms just went haywire between my stomach, chest pain, still having that feeling-like-I’m-swallowing-but-nothing-is-going-down feeling, my face breaking out like I’m 13-years-old (ha ha, just kidding, I didn’t break out as a teenager–I’ve had clear skin almost all my life–don’t you hate girls like me? So lucky.) Oh, and every time I open my mouth after having it closed for more than five minutes–my lips crack and start to bleed. We though that it was a vitamin B deficiency, but I’ve been getting it in my IV consistently, and that’s not helping.

So there’s that.

I can’t give you an explanation for any of these symptoms and I have absolutely no idea how to fix them.

I missed two sessions of cardiac rehab this week. And half my groceries spoiled because I had to go back on the bland diet.

Then this afternoon I took R.J to Supercuts so he could get his hair cut. And I thought: what the hell, why don’t I just get a $15 haircut too? If you’re ever arguing this logic in your head, do me a favor–and smack yourself. Why don’t you get a $15 haircut? Because your hair is going to look like you got it cut for $15.

Oh lord, my hair right now. I can’t even.

So I came in with straightened hair, and she just sprayed it to wet it down. I just asked for a 1inch trim and for her to thin it out. Well, she cut one side, and then matched the length of the other side to the wet-but-drying side’s length. My hair ended up two different lengths on either side and I had to have her redo it, and then redo it again and one more time! Now my hair is about three inches shorter than I wanted it, and I don’t know how she managed it, but the actual texture of my hair feels like I got my ponytail wrapped around some faulty electrical wiring.

Thankfully my hair grows back quickly. Thankfully my hair is still long enough to hide in a bun. Thankfully I still have hair to screw up.

Remember: The only thing stupider than a $15 hair cut, is to cry over a $15 hair cut.

Moving on.

This isn’t even alcoholic. Whatever.





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One thought on “Don’t Cry Over a $15 Haircut, Especially If Your Lips are Bleeding.

  1. gp1

    Sounds like a real productive day.I’m sure some orphans that live on the small Japanese island of Iwo-Jima will be loading up your in box asking you questions about the reproductive system of 20 something American women.Think carefully before you respond to them.Your answers may be life altering for them.After rereading what I just wrote the first thing that comes to mind is……What !

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