GO ME! LFB officially celebrates its first birthday today!
Today as I commemorate myself, and my bad-assery and the 12 arduous and enjoyable months of blogging that I’ve stuck it out here at LetsFeelBetter.com — I thought– let me break it down into a science for you why I’m so widely read and globally famous.
1. Hydration. For the past twelve months I’ve brought you the latest, breaking news on all things sports drinks. Powerade? Gatorade? Propel? Propel Sport? Spark? Mio? Oh my god, the information I’ve dedicated to these salty drinks is unparalleled to ANY OTHER BLOG IN EXISTENCE, All of these companies should make me their spokesperson. Because I remind you of all these beverages, you remind yourself to drink–and when you’re hydrated you’re healthy–and when you’re healthy–you’re happy.
2. My Tips and Tales of Hospitalization. Thanks entirely to my post and none of your life experience, you’ll be vastly prepared to handle a 9 day stay in the hospital. Remember that tip I gave you about dry shampoo? Oh you’ll be whispering my name when your oily tendrils set and dry. You’re welcome.
3. Your Education. Every day–you’re just getting more and more educated. On so many levels. Primary Immune Deficiency Disease. Postural Orthostatic Tacyhcardia Syndrome. Poodles. Underwear Lines. The availability of bagels in Boca Raton. How to grocery shop with a kidney infection. Thanks to LetsFeelBetter.com you are well read and ready to face the world.
4. Self-Esteem. Let’s face it: before Let’s Feel Better you might have felt sad or ashamed of your illness. But now, like me, you probably feel awesome. Like a warrior. Like someone who can park handicapped, walk straight up and say “well, fuck you and your cardigan old man. I’ll park where I’m legally allowed to park.”
5. We’re learning how to handle our shit. I’m going to do everything I can to give you the best advice I have, as soon as I have it. I’ll tell you what to say to people who call you a hypochondriac. I’ll tell you how to handle weirdos at parties. I’ll even help you out with your dating life when you’re basically a third wheel to your disease. This blog has helped me to learn how to verbalize what I want to say to others about my disease–and I hope it’s helping you develop your own description of it too. Remember, the world’s not out to get you because you have a disease. It’s all just some…..
So–Keep moving. Pet a poodle. Buy a taco. And if you love me–if you truly ever loved me–please share this blog with anyone who has ever sneezed, coughed or sustained a brain injury from a close encounter with a sliding glass door.