I Had Surgery and It Actually Helped

Ha ha— Remember that time where I couldn’t eat ANYTHING unless it was blended to mush and then eventually even that was insanely painful?

Well that’s because I had an adhesion wrapped around my intestines (and also a random cyst in that general area) and so food couldn’t get through the kink the tubing.

And I couldn’t get a fucking surgeon to take my case because nothing was showing up on the catscan they took.

Well, finally I just said, fuck it. I am not going to make it to the soonest consult with the surgeon I wanted which was almost a month away.

So I went to the emergency room and basically demanded that they admit me so I could get a next-day consult with the surgeon.

Here are some of the highlights of my hospital stay:

1. My original GI surgeon randomly decided not to do the surgery—PERIOD. Like totally backed out of the process, leaving me very WTF in the emergency room.


2. The surgeon who had done my last adhesion surgery five years ago agreed to do the surgery on the second day I was hospitalized.


3. I got to know my roommate, a 25-year-old drug addict who was there because of a bone infection in her hip. She was in the middle of rehab when she came and was going to be in the hospital for five more weeks.


4. I was basically on non-stop dillauded until they wheeled me into surgery so everything is a blur.


5. Surgery went great. Like—they saw the problem, fixed the problem, sewed me up, and sent me back up to my room with a catheter and lots of drugs.


6. Apparently during this time my mom and R.J freaked out (rightfully) because my drug addict roommate was SMOKING in our hospital room. Like, while I was fresh out of surgery! The hospital took it away and reprimanded her, but wouldn’t switch me out of my room.


7. By the next morning I was up and walking around.


8. I did stay in the hospital for another three days while we waited for my stomach to heal.

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9. Once mobile, I caught my roommate smoking AGAIN and finally got a room switch.


10. I learned that it takes me a minimum of five minutes to remember how to pee once trying, after anesthesia. (For SEVERAL days after.)


The results: I’m walking 30-40 minutes every morning. I’ve eaten one piece of bread this week and it made me feel like crap so everything else has been fruit and veggies and meat and I’m not dead. I’m digesting fiber gummies and a prenatal vitamin. I went to my post-op appointment this afternoon and my surgeon said I’m doing great.

Sorry for the absence over the last few weeks. Still trying to catch up from this unexpectedly long not-fun vacation.




  • Nicole

    so happy to see you are ok!!!!! I’ve missed your posts so much!!!!

  • i love the way you can talk about something so serious with lots of humor and funny gifs!you have a great attuide that will go a long way to helping you get through this!
    so sorrry you had to go through that, but glad to hear you are recovering!
    feel better!so glad you’re recovering!

  • OMG yay! I’m glad you’re doing better! I saw a “finally home after surgery” post on Instagram, and I was very confused and have been checking your blog like crazy to try to figure out what surgery… I’m sorry you needed it, but I’m so glad it actually brought you relief!
    Here’s hoping things continue to look up for you!