The Waiting Game—And Would You Do Me a Favor?


The publishing process is different for every blogger. For instance, I know a girl from my high school who wrote a blog post, it went viral, and someone at Simon & Schuster contacted her about writing a book.

(I have no feelings about this. For instance I have not run around my loft screaming FUCK YOU UNIVERSE and throwing my piles of edits off the staircase and scaring the dog.)

Another blogger I know wrote for some years, pitched and pitched and pitched, and finally found a publishing company to take her on! She revised for a long time, writing very seldomly about the process on her actual mommy blog—but confessed after some time that her book deal had fallen through—that she’d been told her “full story” just wasn’t enough of an actual story.

Then you’ve got your Allie Brosh’s, your Tucker Max’s, Miranda Sings, The Pioneer Woman—all great success stories who took their wit and personality to the net and were rewarded with a book deal.

And then there’s me.


No, wait. Sorry. That’s not me. This is me:



I’ve been working on my first book deal since I was about twelve. That was two noses, two rare disease diagnosis, one husband, a Kia, a Camry, and a Nissan ago. It’s been four different manuscripts, 9,68940394,4059 query letters, some buddhist chanting, and extensive personal training about the industry. I’ve read every book on how to pitch a book. I’ve learned about the history of all the major publishing companies and regularly check their latest releases to stay regular on the kind of trends they’re pushing. I want so badly for my book to be on shelves that my bones practically ache with it. (Or maybe that’s just the lack of potassium) But I very much want to be Ilana Jacqueline, published author.

And though I’ve done my fair share of publishing in magazines and newspapers, on and offline—holding my very own ARC in my hands and seeing my name in print gives me this kind of nauseated, fluttery feeling in my chest and every day the dream is getting a little more real.

If you’ve been following along you’ll know that I signed a book deal with New Harbinger about a year ago to write my memoirs/self-help book on living with chronic illness. Well, the book is now complete and in the hands of the final editorial team who will decide if/when/and how soon my book will go to market. So I’m waiting on my editor to deliver the big news, good or bad. He told me it might take a few weeks. So I’ve been checking my email every 9 seconds, just in case.

The only thing to do now is not freak out.




So now, in this horrible in-between, I ask for your assistance. If you read this blog, but never comment (it’s cool, we’re still friends) or you read this blog and always comment (then you’re my mom) or you’ve read like three of my posts and thought “well, that didn’t completely suck” I hope you would consider liking my FB page and asking your friends to like it too.

Here’s the link:

The Magical Facebook Link

Positive thoughts, compadres.



  • Can’t wait to hear the news about your book!!! Yay!!! This is super exciting 🙂

    (Liked your FB page. Woot!)