Since yesterday I was too hungry and angry to write a long post–I’ll make up for that today.
See–yesterday, after being admitted to the hospital, my mom stopped and grabbed me pita chips, guacamole, and a chicken sandwich. Delighted, I ate the guacamole and decided–well, I’ll save that delicious looking sandwich for a little later. Like when they give me IV antibiotics and I really need something in my stomach.
Well, guess what was also happening that day? A chest cat-scan. With dye. Know what the means? No food for six hours. At first I was like, okay, not a problem. That’s not like an eternity. It’s six hours. No biggie.
So with about a half hour to go, my nurse started my IV antibiotics and—The Great Itching Reaction of 2012 descended on my scalp, neck and chest and we had to stop and call the doc to reavluate. In that short window of time guess who arrived but the guy with the stretcher who was supposed to take me down for my scan. My nurse shewed him away until she spoke with the doctor…which only took another half an hour…meaning it was really only 6:30 when she gave me the benadryl and then she had a few errands before calling downstairs to get another stretcher…
Which didn’t come for another hour and a half. Meaning that by eight o’clock I was a monster. Just a crazy, starving lunatic who kept swearing she was going to “bitchslap the next person who walks in this room and isn’t ready to take me down for the scan!”
In the meantime, R.J and Mom had stopped by with sugar cookies and my favorite Mexican Avacado and Chicken Soup from Senor Burritos….And then my hospital food came…and it actually looked pretty good….but…I still wasn’t allowed to eat.
I did get dinner around 8:45 and I think I ate my weight in chicken, soup, and cookies out of sheer SPITE. For what? Allergic reactions? Slow hospital protocol? Who knows what drives a crazy person enough to eat half a box of Publix sugar cookies? Who really knows?
Right. So. Anyways.
I thought I’d do a quick picture post about what’s in my hospital mini-kit. They’re absolute must haves for when you’re admitted to the hospital. I’m bummed that I forgot my Tresemme Dry Shampoo–but the rest is still good!
MAIN KIT: Here’s my kit. I’ts reasonably sized case with a mesh top so I can see quickly that I have everything I need before I run out of the house. Any make-up bag will do.
Most of these items can be found in the travel-size section of your local Target.
SECRET DEODORANT: Guess what’s not a secret? You stink when you’re in the hospital. Between fevers, uncontrollable temps, and the stress of unfamiliar scans and shots–sweat is bound to happen. And the showers here? Grosser than gross. Don’t go there. Prevent the stank with a little travel size deodorant.
EUCALYPTUS OIL and ORIGINS SENSORY THERAPY: Both of these products are great for nausea, dizziness, and even pain. Sometimes a strong scent can help you keep calm in the hospital, during treatments, procedures, or after taking strong medications.
Colgate Toothpaste and Plastic Flosser: What, you think just because you’re getting your appendix out doesn’t mean you have to keep up on basic oral hygiene? Think again.
Up&Up (Target) Disinfectant Spray: Not to be confused with hand sanitizer This is basically a Lysol counter spray. Spray it on surfaces like doorknobs, hospital toilets, trays, bedsides, night tables, remotes and phones to stay germ-free from the hundreds of other sick, dying people in that room before you.
Bodycology Hand Sanitizer: This has literally lasted me a year and I swear to god I use it like four times every day.
Panty Liners: Obviously men won’t use these in their kit–unless they swing like that. Which is okay. I’m not judging. I’m not sure what I mean by that.
Pure Moist Contact Solution: This is a great travel-size contact solution. It’s lasted me for a good few months. Nice.
Equate Eye Drops: Walmart, yo. Eye drops are great for things like dry eyes and putting in the drinks of people you don’t like. Any brand will do, actually. I’m just cheap. Have you noticed yet?
Lens Case: For lenses. Not nail polish remover. In case you had any confusion on the subject.
Cottonelle Fresh Care Wipes: These are great for wiping yourself off when you’re stuck in a bed for long periods of time, also wiping down tables.
Makeup: Obviously going to the hospital is not something you NEED make-up for. You’re sick. You’re supposed to look like shit. But if you’ve got five minutes and a small eyeshadow pallot–why not suprise people? For me, sometimes all I need is just a teeny-tiny bit of eyeliner to make a huge difference in my look. (Like how it can make people think the circles underneath my eyes are actually eye-shadow smudges and not actual skin.
So! What’s in your hospital kit?